All of the great badasses of our time had their own badass catch phrase. Dirty Harry had “Go ahead. Make my day.” Stone Cold Steve Austin had “…and that’s the bottom line ‘cause Stone Cold said so!” Jerry Sandusky had “Drop your pants, sailor.” Continue reading
For the uneducated hermit, please allow me to explain how a bar works. It is very simple.
First, let us begin with the reason one may walk into a bar. The simplest reason is because this person happens to be thirsty. Maybe the person is lonely and wishes to strike up a conversation about the recent dramatics going on within the Pittsburgh Steelers (or dramatics that involve a Pittsburgh Steeler within a bathroom stall. AM I RIGHT?!?!?!?). There is even a chance that a person has not been laid since the Bicentennial and needs to get himself inebriated to the point where a three-toothed, mole-infested, smoker’s cough spewing, degenerate gambling sea donkey would suffice as a warm body to cushion the fall. Continue reading
It is bad enough that I have to watch other people get drunk to the point that they might piss their pants should somebody turn on a microwave one-hundred feet or less away. It is bad enough that watching girls my age transform into back-alley gutter trash that were probably, at one point, filmed desperately waiting for the pizza boy to arrive tends to turn my libido into dust. As bad as these things are, it is even worse being the only person lonely people attempt to talk to all night. Just because everybody else in the bar finds you to be repugnant does not mean that I won’t. Continue reading
I thought it would be a pretty nice break for the followers of my blog to read about something other than tales of me commandeering a group of inebriated asshats. Believe it or not, there is more to the mind of J.B. than just booze, broads, and bouncing. As I have stated before, I also have the ability to speak on topics that can pull at the heartstrings. For the first time on my blog at WeDebate.it, I am going to attempt to be somewhat profound. Continue reading
There is an origin to every story. Superman/Clark Kent was sent to Earth by his father, Jor-El, as Krypton was being destroyed. Michael Jordan was immaculately conceived and nine months later was born and placed in a manger in Bethlehem on February 17, 1963. I am fairly certain that Kesha…I mean Ke$ha Continue reading
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